by: Sebastien Siclait & Moira Hamilton
I am in love with Sebastien Siclait. No one who knows me will find this to be a revolutionary idea. On the contrary it’s a boring one. It’s quite gross to be this into another person. I’m very aware of this and I’m sorry, but at the same time, I’m not that sorry at all.
Despite being so crazy obsessed with this human man, if you had asked me eight months ago if I thought I could live in seclusion with Sebastien, barely seeing anyone else for a majority of that time, I would've probably said... No? Fast forward seven months and I still look forward to seeing him when we wake up each day. It feels like barely any time has passed at all (important note, time is but a construct, but especially in quarantine). While living, right here right now in America, is often bleak—what with 211,000 dead and counting thanks to COVID; police and white supremacists emboldened by 45 (who threatens to topple what’s left of our democracy)—I have felt consistently lucky beyond words to have Seb by my side.
Rather than pontificating on how our relationship has bloomed throughout the continued downfall of the United States, we thought dipping our toes in some escapist nostalgia would make a more enticing experience for both You, reader, and us. So, I sat down with Sebastien in our living room on our couch (a Facebook marketplace steal), to chat with him about how we met. How in less than a year we went from complete strangers to ultimately making the somewhat reckless—but in my opinion hopelessly romantic—decision to get a place of our own. Enjoy.
- MH Sebastien: So I think you were, you were saying, we started all by chance.
Moira: Yeah. Um, it's crazy that we met because of the internet and—
Sebastien: Like Childish Gambino,
Moira: Yeah, we met because of Childish Gambino. No, no, we met because of the internet. And it was truly by chance... I was supposed to go on another Hinge date that evening I will have you know—I feel like you already know that.
Sebastien: I feel like you've told me that before.
Moira: But you were way cuter.
Sebastien: I also—I don't know if I've told you this—I did also kind of accidentally ask you out as quickly as I did.
Moira: So you didn't—you weren't planning on it? Why are you telling me this now?
Sebastien: It's not that I wasn't planning on doing it—I genuinely wanted to hang out with you. I was trying to subtly lean into it and then I feel like you took it entirely like, “Oh, hang out tonight?" I mean, once you suggested it, then I was totally on board.
Moira: At the time I was very much like, “I don't want to have to talk to people online,” because I had had way too many experiences where people were super chill on text or on Hinge. And then in real life they were total losers. So, I feel like the litmus test was: “let's go get a beer.”
Sebastien: Which honestly totally worked out for me because as I think you and everyone knows, I am terrible at texting or keeping up with text conversations. I think it's been the downfall as to why I haven't gone on many Hinge dates because—I think it's just easy for me to be kind of “out of sight, out of mind.”
Moira: Well, I'm glad we met in person. We got pho. I remember you wore a jean jacket. You were very cute. You were cuter than your pictures and your pictures were already very cute. So that was saying something.
Sebastien: You were also cute. I literally saw you walking into the restaurant from across the street and I was like, [whispers] "that's not her."
Moira: [laughing] Shut up. And then we went and walked around. And we were—we were in Glendale, right?
Sebastien: Glendale. Yeah. We went to a place I did walk to from my apartment.
Moira: Yeah. You were like, “Let's go the easiest possible location for this—so I can escape if it's a bad date.”
Sebastien: “I can just run home...” And then we walked to a bar close to my place and we got drinks. Um, and some guy seemingly was hitting on you or something like that.
Moira: Yeah. And I thought you were cute before that happened. And then I was like, “Oh, he's a MAN.” ‘Cause that guy was just being weird. And I don't remember what you said, but you shut him down. You fully told him to fuck off basically.
Sebastien: Yeah. Which is wild. ‘Cause I remember in the moment, not even fully thinking I was being that bad. And—
You weren't bad. It was good. The guy was being creepy.
Sebastien: But then I remember the moment where the guy got the message and was like, “Oh, look, aight I don't mean anything.” And he got up and walked away and I was like, “Oh, well that was more effective than I thought it would be.”
Moira: Yeah no it was good, it was really good.
Moira: And I think I talked a lot about incels.
Sebastien: You did, you did on our very first date, which gave some great context as to—
Moira: I think I wanted you to know, like, I wanna make sure you're not an incel—no I'm kidding.
Sebastien: Cool, cool, cool. Yeah. I guess I give off, that “might be an incel” vibe.
Moira: Definitely wanted to get politics, religion, all that jazz, right out there.
Sebastien: Which is a fascinating move considering you came in being like, “I gotta pound and get out of here.” [laughing]
Moira: Don't say that—that's getting edited! It's true that I was not looking... That's a good point. I was definitely in LA potentially temporarily. And I was not looking for a long-term situation, to say the least.
Sebastien: Which is, I mean to a certain extent, also true for me showing up on that date. Granted, you had a much more immediate short-term stint on your LA card. But I definitely was in no way committed to LA at the time. And I was not looking to start a big relationship. I think I just a couple months before fully reached my own kind of single, “just livin’ life,” “not trying to be anything” stage.
But it turns out you were so cute and very smart and tall, three huge green lights for me. And I remember we walked down Glendale some more, and we walked back to your place and you didn't kiss me. And I was offended, deeply.
Sebastien: That was the magic trick. You know, you gotta keep 'em curious.
Moira: You kept me interested.
Sebastien: I had a cab driver once tell me, "don't give women what they want too quick. Cause then, then they'll leave you—you solve the mystery and they're done." I don't know if that's true, but I do think in this moment I seem to have kept the allure of mystery going.
Moira: Then I feel like things just really went very quickly. I can't remember if it was after our first date or after our second date, but I said to my friend, Jeremy, whom you know, I said, "I met a man who I'm going to marry."
Sebastien: That is the most—
Moira: Jeremy said, “You need to chill out.” And he was right. But also, he was wrong because here we are. We're not married. I'm so sorry.
Sebastien: Yeah. Woah. Are y